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Top 5 Ways to Help Your Kids Become More Resilient in Life

By: Author Agnes Hsu

Posted on Last updated:

Categories Learn, Parenting

Photo credit: Canva 

Humans aren’t born resilient; they learn how to become resilient from learning from their mistakes and getting knocked down. Resilience is an admirable trait that many people have built over the course of their lifetime. Resilient people are people who are hardened by the events in their life, but soft enough to empathize with people who haven’t experienced difficulties. They are self-sufficient, self-made, used to rejection, and often thought of as the underdog.

These people are admirable because of the hardships they have faced and overcome. How can we as parents take our kids and teach them to become more resilient without putting them through hell? Keep reading to uncover the six ways to help your kids become more resilient in life.

Set an Example by Being Resilient

You can’t teach your kids to become more resilient if you yourself aren’t resilient. Setting an example by being a resilient parent will teach your kids that anyone can be resilient. For example, if you get laid off from work or a family road trip gets canceled, don’t let it consume you. Your kids are watching you as you handle situations that are thrown at you. Try to have a positive outlook on the situation and show your kids that even though things don’t always go the way we planned, it doesn’t mean that we can’t learn from these occurrences. Teaching your kids to have a positive outlook on an otherwise gloomy situation will teach them to do the same.

Don’t Give In to Every Need to Build Resilient Kids

As parents, we want our children to be as comfortable as possible. However, resilience is built upon hardship and difficult situations. Take COVID-19 for example. During the pandemic, we were all in a state of constant uncertainty. We didn’t know when the pandemic would end or when we would be able to see our friends and family again. Kids were especially affected because they couldn’t go to school and interact with their friends and peers. COVID-19 is a perfect example of not getting the thing you need in order to make you feel better. Kids need socialization. They didn’t get it during the pandemic, so what did they do? They adapted. They started new hobbies and went outside more. They developed a coping mechanism for the uncertainty and stress they were feeling. This is also known as resilience.

Socialize Your Kids

Just like we socialize dogs at a dog park, we need to socialize our kids too. Help them become more social by having them talk to adults or introduce themselves to the new kid in class. Whatever the situation may be, being more social and having genuine human interactions will develop resiliency in your kids. They will learn how to understand social norms and cues and also develop the necessary social skills they will need later in life.

Let Them Learn from Their Mistakes

Don’t be fearful of your child making mistakes. Mistakes happen and they’re a part of life. What we choose to learn from our mistakes is a form of resilience. If your kid leaves their backpack at home instead of bringing it to school, don’t bring it to them. They need to learn that actions have consequences and mom or dad won’t always be there to fix it. Chances are, they’ll never leave their backpack at home again after that. Therefore, resilience is built upon learning from one’s mistakes and using that lesson to strengthen themselves.

Teach Your Kids to Solve Problems

Problem-solving is one of the key elements to resilience. It allows your child to face a problem head-on and try to come up with a solution. Teaching your kids to solve problems instead of you solving problems for them will teach them to become more self-reliant, therefore, more resilient.

You are not born with resilience, you merely build it as you go through life. Teaching your kids to become more resilient humans will enable them to face their problems head-on and learn from their mistakes. People who did not learn the path of resilience have a much more difficult time confronting problems or dealing with change. Their parents did not teach them the power of being flexible and rolling with the punches. Resilient people cope with stress; they don’t lie beneath it. Now is the time to start teaching your children the power of resilience and why they need it to survive.

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Agnes Hsu